McShane: “We Still Care The Most About Students Who Don’t Do Anything With Their Lives.”

In a continued effort to increase transparency with the Fordham Community, University President Rev. Joseph M. McShane, S.J. has announced a second round of Pizza with the President for the spring semester. The program, which began last semester, is designed to appeal to the members of the Fordham Community who are doing literally nothing with their lives this academic year.
Similar to the pizza communions which took place in the fall, these conversations will be privy to only twelve students, who will be selected on a first come, first serve basis. They will take place at 12:30 p.m. on Tuesday, April 17 at Rose Hill, or on Tuesday, April 24 at Lincoln Center. These time slots mean that the only people who can attend these luncheons are the lucky students who do not have classes, or internships, or interviews, or club elections, or other obligations that conflict with the meeting times, and have enough incentive to respond to their emails for once.
“Twelve students who have minimal commitments are really my ideal demographic,” McShane told us in an exclusive interview. In the fall, he told us he really just wants students “who aren’t really doing anything here because they won’t have anything of consequence to say to me.”
Chuck Borenstein, who participated last time, was overjoyed to hear that Pizza with the President would be making a comeback.
“That meeting with Father McShane made me feel heard and validated,” Borenstein told us, having just left his room for the third time this academic year. “The only way to get students to come to something is to give them free food and fight for useless exclusivity, so this is wonderful. It’s exactly what I was looking for in my Fordham experience.”
Borenstein, however, was disappointed; previous Pizza with the President participants cannot join in the festivities this time around. That’s an effort on the administration’s part to make sure McShane meets with as many people as possible for the sake of building trust and transparency with Fordham students. Thanks to this generous accommodation to inclusivity and openness, McShane will have successfully met with a whopping 0.813% of the undergraduate student body through this initiative by the end of the academic year.
These Pizza with the President meetings are taking place again because the university has decided that it is still the most effective way of communicating with the student body. Town Hall style meetings that would be open to the press and where more students could attend was proposed, but eating pizza with 24 students still seemed like a much easier option.